| Billie jeannnnnnn |
[24 Jan 2012|11:52pm] |
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the Saturdays - I say ok |
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did I mention it's gonna be a long semester?
I got into problems seminar today. lots of reading.
yeah, really stressful semester.
oh, and I'm dying of a real bad cough :( here we go....
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| I don't give a -uh- don't really care... I say ok! |
[21 Jan 2012|05:06pm] |
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sometimes I wonder how doctors got their licenses. this is like my 5th time in the bathroom because of these stomach issues that my doctor can't seem to figure out. these meds are draining every ounce of energy out of me. I'm so annoyed.
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| it's a perfect world when you go all the way |
[20 Jan 2012|01:26am] |
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had a weird first day back at school. felt like I was the only one that didn't want to go back
horoscopes are strangely accurate for me, g, and m. oh boy.
this is going to be a long semester.
I couldn't even use the weird smiley face because it was like a weird in a good way. uncomfortable works.
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[14 Jan 2012|07:31pm] |
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i love it. you're honest with someone, and they are oh so super honest and such an asshole back. you always thought i was lying, so there was the honest truth. peace out.
but just got back from the hockey game. quinnipiac killed colgate 7-1! good stuff. i miss playing so much. i should devote the time that i'm not spending on chasing after little foolish boys and train to get into shape to play again. i will find somewhere to play, i will. of course i go to a college where there is no women's team. my decision sucked.
i'm super tired. i'm supposed to go out to eat, but my stomach is killing me from the hot chocolate. just a couple more days and i'm going out with anesthesia for the stomach test :\ so scary.
i thought i'd have more to write but i'm trying to forget certain things and too emotionally upset over my previous lack of devotion to hockey. wahhhh.
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| get ready, get set, cos the more i get, the more more more i want. |
[29 Dec 2011|01:38am] |
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it's amazing how such thoughts come to mind at 1:40 in the morning. i just got back from the party catching up with an old classmate talking about other classmates and how much people have changed. we haven't been able to find one old classmate that changed for the GOOD. every girl is getting knocked up, and every guy turned into a douchebag. it's sad that people feel the need to be more of a dick than a nice person. this is why our world is going to the shitter. this generation hold the role models for the next generation. and what are we teaching them? getting pregnant is cool at 20 years old. yeah, your life will just be beginning. NOT. your life is over sweetheart. oh, and it's cool to do drugs and nothing but drink your whole life. what a waste of money? and health? yeah.
it's also amazing that people would be in a relationship and then cheat. why? why wouldn't you just STAY SINGLE? that way you can fuck whoever you want without consequences or guilt. it amazes me with some of the guys. you know you can't commit to one girl, so DO NOT BOTHER. i'm not just bashing guys. women are cheaters too. women put emotion into it though. silly girls. guys can fuck another girl and be emotionally committed to one. not that i'm giving an excuse. cheating is wrong and stupid. if you wanna be with other people, then just stay single and be with other people. do not string one girl along and then break a heart.
i can't believe in like 4 days, it will be five months since i've had sex. you know what? i feel awesome. absolutely awesome. i don't have any of the stress that came with it. i just haven't had luck with guys. some of them just turned out to be such assholes. i realized tonight, though, that i miss one of them. but i'm not into him like that anymore. i ruined a friendship by letting it get as far as it did. i want to rewind like it didn't happen. i'm gonna wait til "prince charming" -- no KING charming -- comes and give him my all. however, he doesn't exist. if i'm gonna be alone forever, then i'm gonna be alone forever. i'm ok with that.
this took my like 10 minutes to type because i played with my dog. i think i'm getting my hair cut and dyed tomorrow. scared!
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[27 Dec 2011|02:41am] |
been going through my old livejournal. posts are from 2005! when i was just starting high school! holy shit.
i had that HUGE crush on steve. and i didn't realize how close we apparently got at this time. i'm done with this crush thing once i'm over him. i'm almost there. i keep telling myself he's an asshole and he'll never text me and it's helping me out big time. i'm done.
it's 3am, i need to sleep.
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| "you're funny." "i love you" |
[22 Dec 2011|01:35am] |
school is all over. well... until january. gahhhh. spent about $530 for christmas. so. broke.
i started typing because i had other things to say, but now i've forgotten them because facebook took over my attention.
but i must say. i LOVE how some chicks are just DESPERATE for drama. leave that shit in MIDDLE school, girlfriend.
all right, merry christmas. peace and love \\//
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| SO DON'T TURN OUT THE LIGHTS NOWWWWWWWWWW <3333 |
[15 Nov 2011|01:50am] |
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i decided to log on in after being on my last.fm. wow, haven't posted since may. well my summer break was... eh, somewhat better? i hung out with some serious losers and was so happy when we all stopped being friends in august. i was neglecting to hang out with the real friends i wanted to. i got to hang out with b, j, l, etc etc after me and that "group" stopped being friends. imma be doing something with me soon, i'm not gonna be in connecticut for much longer to be friends with wastes of times. but it wasn't just them. i found out some guys aren't worth my time either. actually.. every guy isn't worth my time. i don't think that these certain TWO BOYS know they ruined my life. well, not really, but a part of it. yeah, i liked sleeping around. well, because of two individuals i don't. they'll never know they're roommates either. and unless they're stalking me, they'll never find this. ...or know it's about them.
OW! i just had another stomach cramp. i have no idea what is wrong. :( i have to go for another endoscopy soon. they found a polyp last time in my small intestine.. what does that mean?
oh, i lied. not every guy isn't worth my time. one is. the same one from about 2 years ago. :( he'll never like me like that ever. i don't know why i can't give him up. is it the mixed signals? i moved seats in a class to kind of behind him and he kept looking over. we're SO perfect for each other, it's disgusting. and it'll never happen. even da wifey said we'd be perfect for each other and everyone asks us if we're together. first time working with m to study, she asked me if we were dating. it sucks having to say no. we just... work. that's the only way i can put it. when i was really upset with one of the boys mentioned before, i told him i wasn't in a laughing mood so he made me laugh more. we know when we're hanging out or when i'm just in his room to do homework. that's it, we just... work. we do. we work well together. and he's amazing. i don't think he knows.
i should probably get sleep. and maybe i'll write in this more. and maybe i should go on tumblr. lol yeah that needs to be updated.
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[14 May 2011|11:52am] |
lawlz @ last entry. my, how in one month that entry is now in void. actually like a week after that event happened, i stopped talking to him. i didn't talk to him in over a month, i moved on and i'm working on a new boy. but i did text him last night to instigate. my sister had met him and she was like aww i like him a lot! so i kept shoving his girlfriend in my sister's face. hahaha.
summer break sucks, i miss my friends.
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[08 Apr 2011|03:49pm] |
never thought i'd do what i did last night, ever. i hope i'll know what i'm talking about when i'm reflecting on this post a little later.
but last night was adventurous and very disappointing. but so was today. i'm being sued. REALLY? those people can really go screw themselves as they just screwed me and my family over hard. life was going good until last night.
i didn't really have a point to updating, i just felt necessary. i was on tumblr (yes, joined the trend, obviz) and it asked for livejournal. i was trying to log in with this account info and realized i was on here not there haha
sunday night i register for fall of 2011, my how time as just flown
this entry is all over the place, but i can't stop seeing him. if you're reading, and you know me, you'll know who i mean. i was with him last night. he has a girlfriend but i can't wait for the next time i'll see him. it's very messed up on my end, i hate him for it, but i don't know, he's different. although he freaked me out last night. he told me he likes me more than his girlfriend. he tried breaking up with her, but it didn't work out. i don't know if i believe him, i more than likely don't. but he stopped liking her when she was all up in his business wanting to move in with him and stuff, but yet he begged me to go out with him this weekend? oh, how the tables have turned? but i do enjoy his company. probably a lot more than i should.
i need to update this more.
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[12 Feb 2011|09:19pm] |
quit cohen's 2 days earlier than i thought. got 2 weeks left babyyy
wow, last night man.
love my life.
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[11 Feb 2011|12:10am] |
i dropped a class, i'm down to 5.
i'm quitting cohen's on sunday, down to one job.
moved into winchester.. illegally.
linkin park got cancelled for tomorrow, i'm super sad :(
i'm really such a weird loser, i don't know why people talk to me lmfao
letting go of the past, and moving forward.
talking to someone i was avoiding real bad so i'm maturing.
i get to see matt tomorrow.... awkward?
now i get to have wings tomorrow though with cheryl.
i loved how when i was working tonight liz came in, then lisa. then right after cheryl and jim. then right after steven, amanda and tiffany. i have like 4 tables full of people for me. lmao
i'mmmmmmmmmmm so tired. i'm over life right now. hhahaa.
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[27 Jan 2011|04:41pm] |
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drinking laxatives for a colonoscopy tomorrow. love life???
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[19 Jan 2011|11:31pm] |
spring semester starts tomorrow. I am not ready! ahhhh!
6 classes & 3 jobs. who is pumped? not me!
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[13 Dec 2010|12:00am] |
to sum up today: i really am a good friend; i am officially emotionally hurting :(; emergency room sucks; can't wait to quit cohen's.
the end & good night.
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[07 Dec 2010|03:13pm] |
i'm sitting in the library, knowing i have to write this final and i just can never concentrate. ANYWAY.
i'm doing good! i'm trying to eliminate guys as best i can. of course it doesn't help when more come into the picture. i've decided i'm gonna go to the movies with guy #1, just as friends. i KNOW i don't want a boyfriend, no way. guy #2 keeps wanting to come over, and i keep saying no. no more late night booty calls??? whatttt, who woulda thought. [ maybe over winterbreak ;x ] guy #3, is it real sad i wanna just sleep with him every night. it's amazing. but other than that, we don't ever hang out or even like talk. but he is still very good in bed, oh my. guy #4, who i was in love with said real mean thing to me. i went like 4 whole days without talking to him until HE texted ME. yes sirrr.
nonetheless, last night was amazing. watched football with my boys. i hate football but i miss them all so much. i wish i wasn't so busy, and i wish i didn't live like so far away. i miss everyone sososo much. and now they're ready to leave me! oh well, i guess i can expect to spend my break either at work or in stamford!
maybe i should focus on this final. i only have a little bit more to go, and i'm bullshitting the rest of it. i did a good project and a good first half of the final, this one can be terrible. the stepson committed the burglary, and the stepmother is not pressing charges. simple enough hehe whateverrrr
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[24 Nov 2010|01:50pm] |
this thanksgiving is probably gonna suck. my dad isn't with us anymore, obviously. but now my sister is going to chris's house. ryan is going to nicole's. jason is going to his new girlfriend's.
my mom wants to go out to get dinner, which just isn't the same.
why must my life be so messed up? granted, it could be worse like other people have it, but this just sucks.
i'm sitting here listening to my oldies music and really thinking about a lot.
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[17 Nov 2010|11:57pm] |
it's sickening how much i am falling more and more in love with him.
and i can do nothing but just hide it.
ps my speaking teacher can suckkk itttt i hate that class so bad now
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[07 Nov 2010|09:19pm] |
got the last 3 wisdom teeth out. i feel absolutely icky. friday, came home and couldn't even talk. i think i was the only patient that it took forever to put out and find a heartbeat in a TOE. my fingers were purple and not registering. had a near death experience just like in the movies, yeah went there. yesterday, woke up, passed out in bathroom and was hyperventialating because i couldn't breathe. my mom needed to bring me a paper bag to breathe. but elisa, fatima and the baby came over! it was awesome :) i love them! watched the hangover.
today, i woke up couldn't even open my mouth.
is it messed up that i can lay next to him, but think about the real boy that i want? i feel it's absolutely terrible. but i think i really like this other kid. too bad i don't think i'm his type and he won't feel anything toward me. can only hope right? :-/
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[10 Oct 2010|08:53pm] |
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i'm caught in a godsmack hangoverrrrrrrrrrrr <3
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